I am in flux.
Emotionally, I am in a weird space.
I don't know what's wrong, but something is off. I don't know what I want or what I need or what I don't want or might not need. It's a tough thing. It leaves me at loose ends and I don't like it. I feel like I am ready for some kind of transition, some kind of change or some kind of movement. I don't know what shape that might take, or how soon it might come about, but today was spent in self-care in an effort to get at the things that are bothering me most deeply.
I met with a friend for coffee.
I went to a meeting (topic: anger) (coincidence? you guess!).
I got a sandwich and went to visit some friends.
I soaked in an old-fashioned cast iron and enamel, claw-foot bathtub with hot water and essential oil of lavender.
I talked about love and life and emotions and communication and poetry.
I dipped artisan bread with herbs and feta cheese in olive oil and munched while chatting about all kinds of things with the cute baker.
I collected some bricks for a wee project.
I drove around the coast of Maine, got a little lost (both physically and metaphorically), but made it home OK.
There is growth coming. I can feel it. It may not be pretty as it happens, but there's not much I can do about it. I must do what needs doing. And I won't know what that is until I step into the fear place and take a look around.
Stay tuned.
